Latest Funny Jokes in English
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don’t have eyes.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
A day without sunshine is like, night.
Born free, taxed to death.
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.
Funny Jokes in Hindi 2019 for Whatsapp
There is no wind in the football.. 😆
2) I talk, he talk, why you middle talk?. 😝
3) You rotate the ground 4 times.. 😳
4) You go and understand the tree. 😳😳
5) I’ll give you clap on ur cheeks.. 😓
6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father. 😓😓
7) Close the window airforce is coming. 😂
8) I have two daughters and both are girls.. 😂😭
9) Stand in a straight circle.. 😆
10) Don’t stand in front of my back 😱😭😭
A bright young executive had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech firm. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and handed him three numbered envelopes.
“Open these if you run up against a problem you don’t think you can handle,” he said.
Well, things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales took a nosedive and he was really catching a lot of heat from the board. At wit’s end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, “Blame your predecessor.”
The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the board, the press, and Wall Street responded positively, sales picked up, stock prices rose and the problem was soon behind him.
About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in sales, combined with serious problems getting new product to market. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO wasted no time in opening the second envelope. The message read, “Reorganize.” This he did, and again the company quickly rebounded. After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times. The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope. The simple message said, “Prepare three envelopes…”
Swami Vivekananda Kahani
Chandni raat sahil ko diwana bana deti hai…
shamma parwane ko jala deti hai..
Ishaq aisi chiiz hai…
jo achcho achcho ko roola deti hai…!
Kabhi Tum Gor Se Dekho Aaina; Wah Wah Kabhi Tum Gor Se Dekho Aaina; Khud Hi Hanskar Kahoge Made in China Made in China
Hum Aaj Bhi Dil Ka Aashiyana Sajane Se Darte Hain,
Baagon Mein Phool Khilaney Se Darte Hain,
Hamari Ek Pasand Se Tut Jaayeinge Hazaaro Dil,
Tabhi Toh Hum Aaj Bhi Girlfriend Bananey Se Darte Hain…
Mere Dost Tum Bhi Likha Karo Shayari; Tumhara Bhi Meri Tarah Naam Ho Jayega; Jab Tum Par Bhi Padenge Ande Aur Tamatar; To Shaam Ki Sabji Ka Intajaam Ho Jayega
A man goes down on his knees and proposes to her..
Marry Me... and Make me the Happiest Man in the World
Looking bewildered she replied
.
.
.
.
You want Both !!!??
Husband and Wife jokes
While getting married, most of the guys say to girl's parents dat, "Mai aapki beti ko shaadi ke baad bohot khush rakhunga"
Have you ever heard a girl saying something like this to the boy's parents....??????
No..... because women don't lie
Wife: I have changed my mind
Husband: Is it working now?
Husband and Wife jokes
Maximum wives hate their husband's friends...!!!
Maximum husbands love their wife's friends...!!!
.....Men are generally nice.....
Husband and Wife jokes
Very Funny Jokes in Hindi For Whatsapp Download 2019
Difference between "Facebook" and "Whatsapp" conversation :
On "Whatsapp" -
Wife : Kab se wait kar rahi hoon. Ghar kab aa rahe ho, Loafer?
Husband : Abhi kuchh pataa nahi. Dimaag mat chaato. Jab dekho pareshaan karti rehti ho.
On "FaceBook" -
Wife : Dear when will you be back? You are the best husband in the world. Miss you. Come back soon.
(Status liked by 50 of her friends)
Husband : Thanks for being there always. So lucky to have a wonderful wife like you. Will be back soon honey. (Status liked by 75 friends,
including sister-in-law & mother-in-law) Dow din se mera Kya hoga?
Funny Jokes in Hindi
